About Baseball And Presidential Elections

The Cleveland Indians had the Chicago Cubs ready for the dumper with a 3-1 lead in the Series. One more game in their hip pocket and Cleveland would rule the baseball world. Curses! The Cubs win 3 straight and the baseball throne is theirs.

Hillary Clinton as recently as two weeks ago was a shoo-in to become the first female President of the United States of America. Fast forward to November 6 and Hillary Clinton may be the first female Presidential candidate to concede to President -elect Donald Trump.

Inconceivable? Unfortunately not. The Cubs are guaranteed their throne for one year. A President Trump would rule for at least four years. Unacceptable but possible. There are enough stupid voters ready to commit the unpardonable act of voting for a simpleton. Come to think of it, birds of a feather flock together. Only a bird brain would waste his vote on Trump.

 This must be a nightmare. There is no way it will play out like this tomorrow. Or is there?

Futbol 1 - Baseball 0

Woe be to me! I'm afraid I have angered the Baseball Gods. I did the unforgivable yesterday. Three innings into the Indians-Mariners game , I switched over to World Cup futbol (Costa Rica vs Greece). To make matters worse, I enjoyed the game.  I was impressed with the athleticism of the players. As far as I'm concerned, they put our brawny football players to shame.  I also now understand why there is such an outpouring of emotions when a goal is scored - it is damn difficult. I could become a futbol soccer fan ( once I come to terms with a penalty kick shoot off) . The low scoring doesn't bother me. After all, I'm an Indians fan. Oh yes, the Indians. The Baseball Gods had their revenge - Indians 0  Mariners 3. Indians 1 hit, Mariners 10.

Thank God For Baseball

Thank God for baseball especially when a Nick Swisher steps up to the plate in the tenth inning with the bases loaded, two outs, the count 1-2, and the score Angels 3 - Indians 1. With a swing of his bat, the ball sails out to right field over the fence. Grand Slam!!!! Indians win! A walk off win! For a few brief minutes all the ills surrounding us are forgotten. All is well with life. Once the cheering ends and the fans exit the field, reality returns. There are problems to be dealt with. Problems which strive to make baseball irrelevant. Problems which have no chance of being cleared by a Grand Slam. They will be there tomorrow. So will the boys of summer when again for a few hours all will be well with the world, at least in the ball park. Thank God for baseball.

More About Newspapers

I used to enjoy my morning paper. Actually I still do whenever The Plain Dealer sees fit to deliver one. I have noticed, however, that where once I eagerly awaited the morning paper, I now could care less. The non existence of home delivery of The Plain Dealer three times a week has weaned me away from newsprint dependence. As I plunk that cup of coffee on the table, out comes the smart phone full of all the news that's fit to be browsed. Even if it's a day that a newspaper is at the garage door, the smart phone news comes first. Once I get the newspaper indoors, it takes about ten minutes to discover that a lot of the news in print is already stale. Yes Plain Dealer, you have convinced me that news delivery is undergoing a big change. I'd cancel my subscription and get the latest smart phone but The High Primal still prefers newsprint. I must admit that we get our moneys worth as far as she is concerned. I doubt that there is a story or a classified ad that escapes her attention. Not so with her low primal spouse - even the paper's baseball news plays second fiddle to what he gets on his phone. This whole subject was discussed with my granddaughter who agreed whole heartily with her grandfather. That made me feel ten years younger. Now if I can wean The high Primal from CNN's Situation Room, I can knock off a few more years.

This is for the birds

Mayday! Mayday! We're all messed up! A little bird told me that today is the day we celebrate labor but he was wrong. The little fellow has a bad GPS and thought he was in Europe.

If we are such a good friend of the European Union why do we celebrate Labor Day on the first Monday of September rather than today? A more relevant question is how long will it be before the Republicans and the Tea Party weaken the labor movement so much that a Labor Day celebration will become irrelevant?

When I came up with this post, I had no intent of cutting a hog in the ass. I just  wanted to make note of a day which honors people who dirty their hands while working ( I know, I know, the wolfs of Wall Street have dirty hands also). Besides that, it would be nice to start off the month with a post. I decided to kill two birds with one stone and take a flier. As it turns out, the early bird did not get the worm. A post about May Day falls flat. Its just not much of a holiday in these parts. On May 1st we'd prefer to celebrate the start of Spring weather, plant some geraniums, dance around the maypole and start making plans for that barbecue or baseball game on Memorial Day.

The best that can be said for this post is that a post in the hand is worth two in the bush.  If I had to rate it, I would give it the bird.

Unfinished Business

The Cleveland Indians have adopted "Unfinished Business" as their battle cry for the 2014 season. The PR people would have the fans believe that the team will be taking care of business and bring a championship to Cleveland this year. Judging from the team's pitching so far this season, one might speculate that by the end of April the Indians will be finished and all that Cleveland sports fans will be interested in is the NFL Draft. I doubt that they will be finished that early. Chief Wahoo has other plans. The Chief has unfinished business also. As long as he is denied retirement, he will see to it that the Cleveland Bunglers, aka Cleveland Indians flirt with success all season long but in the long run will carry over "Unfinished Business" to 2015.

The powers to be in the Indians front office just cannot accept that the Cleveland Indians have been cursed by an aging Chief Wahoo. They dilly dally with block C as the team symbol but still put the Chief Wahoo patch on uniforms. They are reluctant to cut ties with the Chief for fear of losing fans. Still they push the Chief in the background. They ought to unequivocally declare the Chief retired. Give him a box seat and let him root for the Indians rather than curse them. Failing that action, the team's management should have the guts to declare that the Chief will remain as the team's mascot until hell freezes over. As the Chief would say, "Shit or get off the pot".

Having said that - GO TRIBE!

(As of 4/30/2014, the Indians are in complete control of last place in the AL Central. La maledizione!)

You're as blind as a bat!

My favorite sport, baseball, has succumbed to the cries for replay. No longer can we enjoy the spectacle of a manger venting his anger at an umpire after a controversial call at home plate. "you're as blind as a bat" has been replaced with " I'm challenging your call, please call New York". If Pete Rose were playing today he would look like an ordinary base runner. No longer would catchers brace themselves for the inevitable collision as he barreled down the third base line. I must admit that I do not fully understand the new "replay" rule on plays at home plate. (Just for the record, I am not in favor of seeing a catcher maimed trying to protect the plate nor a runner risking a concussion in order to score a run.)

The entertaining tantrums of managers are being replaced with the endless. boring chatter of play by play announcers trying to explain the replay rules. Did I say boring? What is more boring than waiting for an "expert" in New York to rule on a challenged play in Los Angeles? Even the commercials eating up air time while he diddles with ten TV monitors are more interesting than listening to someone explain over and over again why the replay option makes the game safer (and slower).

I wouldn't be surprised if teams elect to hire a new coach. He must have a law degree and twenty years experience arguing before the Supreme Court. His title will be "Challenge Coach". The Challenge Coaches' primary function will be to keep the manager from making an ass of himself if he's pissed about the way the umpire ruled on a play at home plate .

 As for baseball fans, they should make a pilgrimage to a religious shrine of their choice, and pray to some Almighty that baseball not be allowed to go down the tubes because an umpire misses a call now and then or an athlete gets injured occasionally. A few extra prayers for the umpires who are slowly being replaced by a boob tube would be in order.

Of course the ultimate solution to make baseball safer for the players is to convince them that violence is not a replacement for baseball skills. Easier said than done? How about hefty fines (six figures) or even suspension? Of course, violence in baseball or any other spectator sport will never be eliminated. Violence is the American way. Look at our love affair with guns.

March Madness

March Madness has crossed the line. It was bad enough when we had to suffer the interminable basketball tournaments but now March Madness can't handle a gentle welcome to Spring. Spring is here but we will fall back to below normal temperatures and possibly snow. The Ukraine will see no Spring. The Cold War is back and Russia will spring forward. Add to the list Malaysian Flight 370 which is a MIA and you must conclude that indeed March events are meant for a loony society. Further proof? Baseball season will open this weekend but not in the USA. Opening day in MLB has been outsourced - the Dodgers will play Arizona in AUSTRALIA. How mad can March get? How about Obama and Congress kissing and making up. It will not happen. Making out is more likely but have no fear, April is near. God is merciful. Allah is great. If ever the twain meet, it sure would be neat. Oops, I've crossed the line into March Madness.

No to making Opening Day a federal holiday

Some former ball players are trying to get Congress to make baseball's Opening Day a federal holiday. My first reaction is that these old codgers are starving for publicity. My second reaction is that the idea is absurd.

I submit that Opening Day has been a "people's holiday" for decades. Baseball fans have already made it a holiday to rival any federal holiday. Putting a stamp of  'federal holiday' on it raises the possibility that spontaneous joys such as skipping school or calling in sick on a job in order to get to the ballpark will be lost. There is no need of government messing around with what is already a special day for millions. No seal of approval is warranted. It is a done deal. Furthermore, if the big box stores get wind of this movement, they will degrade the day with Opening Day Sales. No to making Opening Day a federal holiday!

My third reaction is ho-hum. Not to worry, Congress is too busy taking a holiday from legislating. Besides, fans (the 99 per-centers that is) are too busy making ends meet to sign any petition.

If Congress wakes up and sees this movement as an opportunity to gain favor with the electorate, I hope some congressman adds an amendment requiring the Cleveland Indians to retire Chief Wahoo.

It's Later Than You Think

Signs that the aging process has taken over:

• You mute the TV set during the mandatory butchering of the national anthem by a Grammy Award winner prior to the start of a World series game.
• You fall asleep during the sixth inning of a World Series game.
• You are annoyed by the facial hair of baseball players.
• You can't tell which is the home team.
• You detest "terrible towels" at baseball games.
• You could care less who wins the World Series.
• You can't wait until next season when the Indians win it all.
• You are writing this post while the game is on.

The World Series Mirror The USA

Normally at this time of year I'm engrossed in the World Series. It may be a stretch, but in my book Baseball's World Series mirrors the greatness of this country. This year that mirror is a bit clouded. I haven't watched one game beyond the sixth inning. The play has been sloppy and Boston's beards are more suited for a Halloween party than the World Series. Why should I expect more? The World Series mirrors the good old U. S. of A. Our politics are sloppy, the NSA is pretending to be the Gestapo, the launch of Obamacare has been frightening. The World Series with all its misplays will be over next week. Our politics show no signs of abandoning the World Series of Misplays.

I love Westerns, but not guns

This is a post about guns. No, I'm not going to rant about the latest gun massacre on the national scene. I'm passing on the Washington, D.C. Naval Yard gun violence. I'll probably pass on the next massacre and the one after that and the one.........enough already. That's not what I want to write about. I've already done it 47 times and realize I'm beating a dead horse.

My issue with guns in this post is a passion of mine. I love Westerns. I'll turn off a baseball game

with the Indians at bat in the bottom of the ninth, the bases loaded and no outs, in order to catch a movie about the Wild West. The Wild West equates with guns. Lots of guns and lots of mayhem. I'll stay glued to the TV set fascinated by the fastest gun in the west. It's been this way since I was a child. I recall my cousin and I replaying every Western we just saw at the neighborhood theater. My favorite role was playing Tom Mix (not because his horse was named Tony).

 Even in the midst of a depression, gun sales (toy guns that is) were brisk. They came in all forms. I loved the ones that fired caps. My cousin opted for a bee-bee gun. My father emphatically let me know that anything more deadly than a cap gun was taboo for me.

The point is, I'm having a difficult time rationalizing my passion for Westerns with my passion for more effective control of guns in our modern society. I never traded in my toy gun for the real McCoy. I feel fortunate that I have never wanted to settle a dispute in the manner of those quick draw artists of the past. With my temper, this has been a blessing. Still, I don't feel like a hypocrite while I'm watching a Western. As the song goes, "that's entertainment".

 This country, whether we like it or not, was put together by gun violence but it does not follow that gun violence must continue to be at the forefront today. Had to get that last piece of preaching or "botta" into this post. Now it's time to bring it to an end. It's almost time for "Gunfight at the OK Corral".

A Wandering Mind Gathers No Moss

Worries Mount as Syria Lures West’s Muslims- so blared the headline for a story in last Sunday’s New York Times. Evidently much ado is being made about who is helping the rebels. “Young Muslims are traveling to Syria to fight against the government of Bashar al-Assad, raising fears among American and European officials of a new terrorist threat when they return home”. Not necessarily true. Foreigners fighting in the Spanish Civil War were the inspiration for some great novels- not terrorism. Maybe some young radicalized Muslim will return from Syria and write “For Whom The Muezzin Calls”. We may even see some  historical epics like “The Cedars Believe In Allah” or “Winter in Damascus”. Then again they may return as more accomplished bombers.

Carlos Danger, aka Anthony Weiner, is giving user names a bad name.

Finally got a letter from The Plain Dealer explaining how pleased I’ll be with their 3 day a week home delivery and what a treat their e-edition will be. Re-read it three times and I still was not thrilled until I realized that there was indeed a plus side to the reduced delivery of hard copies. Fewer papers to put out for recycling. As for the e-edition, my DEL button will handle the trashing.

I haven’t written much about the hard playing Cleveland Indians who are currently 2.5 games behind the Division leader. I’m not going to start now since I’m mindful of Chief Wahoo’s curse. If only the Dolans would retire him, first place would be a cinch.

The Cleveland Browns opened training camp last week. They are apparently way ahead of schedule- one concussion already reported.

Kudos to Senator Sherrod Brown. He's moving to Cleveland from the outer suburb of Avon. Another way of looking at it, the good senator is putting his money where his mouth is.

One way to beat cancer - redefine it! A group of experts has determined that as far as cancer is concerned we are still living in the nineteenth century. What to do? They have recommended changing the definition of cancer and eliminating the word from some common diagnoses as part of sweeping changes in the nation’s approach to cancer detection and treatment. That will bring the cancer rate down dramatically. Now we need to redefine what obesity is and eliminate so many fat people walking the streets.

A Missed Opportunity

The Indians, along with the other MLB teams, will feature camouflage colors on their  uniforms to honor veterans on Memorial Day. They will be wearing camouflage colored hats and camouflaged lettering on their jerseys. Unfortunately the grotesque caricature of Chief Wahoo will still appear on the jersey sleeve. It would have been appropriate if Indians management, out of respect for Native Americans who have served their country, had removed Chief Wahoo from the uniforms. Isn't it time to write Chief Wahoo's obituary? Today would have provided the perfect platform to announce his demise. A missed opportunity.

Tigers Purr Away The Series

The Detroit Kittens were eaten up by the San Francisco Giants, puting an end to my career as a prognostigator. No problem! The pay was lousy.

Looking forward to MLB reruns of the 2012 baseball season. Sure beats the hell out of football. Speaking of football- on the other hand let's not. Lets talk about Chief Wahoo - on the other hand , lets not. How about baseball forecasts for 2013? There will be baseball in 2013.

My name is Tony Rugare, and I don't approve of this message.

For What It's Worth

The Giants beat the crap out of the Tigers last night 8-2. The sports experts have all sort of takes on this unexpected outcome. Not surprisingly, most comments have a lot to do with the Tigers' Verlander and the Giants' Sandoval - the big bust and the big bomber. Not one sportswriter has come up with the real culprit behind the Tigers ineptness. It wasn't Verlander's fault. The guy was a victim; a victim of the New York Yankees. The damn Yankees doomed the Tigers when they caved in during the ALCS and dropped four straight games to Detroit. New York knew they didn't have a shot to get into the series, so they deliberately embarrassed themselves. The strategy? Make it so easy for the Tigers in mid October that they would be as as rusty as a Model A in late October. Sour grapes on the part of the Yankees but it's working so far.

The other factor behind the Tigers loss last night was the Giants. Yes the Giants had something to do with the Tigers loss. Not so much their bats and pitching - their looks. The Giants are the scariest looking team in all of baseball. They make Al Qaeda look like a bunch of altar boys. I wouldn't want to meet Angel Pavan in a dark alley. That Pence guy looks like he would like to use his bat to bash a few heads. And those beards - enough said. It was almost like watching a bunch of hoodlums playing a Little League team; one exception - that Posey guy looks almost normal. I don't blame the Tigers for running for cover.

So where do we go from here? Beats the shit out of me. Damn Yankees!

Damn Yankees!

Thank God for baseball’s playoffs. If all we had to look forward to this month were presidential debates, campaign speeches and the fate of Big Bird it would be grounds for finding a quiet padded cell somewhere. Not that baseball can’t drive you up the wall. The failure of your favorite team to achieve post season honors however, is not a reason for taking the bridge. Which brings me to the Cleveland Indians? On the other hand, I don’t want to go there. Words cannot express my disappointment with their performance. I’ve gotten to the point where I’m adopting my boyhood team as my favorite to go all the way in October. Yes, I’m going to root for the damn Yankees.



Pop's favorite Yankee-Joe DiMaggio

Rooting for the Yankees shouldn’t be too difficult. I did it for many years. My father was a rabid Yankee fan. I don’t think he ever had a baseball in his hands. I suspect that names like DiMaggio, Rizzuto, and Berra on the Yankee roster had a lot to do with his loyalty. I can still remember the radios on the front porches in our neighborhood tuned in to Yankee games vividly described by Mel Allen and his inimitable, “How a-bout that?!" Yes, damn it, I can root for the Yankees again. I don’t care for Alex Rodriguez but I have the utmost respect for Derek Jeter. There is always C.C. Sabathia to root for - a product of the Cleveland Indians. I can do it - if I can tune out the obnoxious fans.

Obnoxious Yankee fans could be the deal breaker. The last I heard, Rudy Giuliani was still wearing a Yankee hat. How the hell can I root for something he roots for? Damn Yankees, why don’t they take his seasons tickets away from him on the grounds that he doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground? I may have a hole in my head, but regardless of Giuliani, I’m going to root for the Yankees to get in the Series. I’m also going to root for Obama to kick ass in the next debate.

Damn Yankees! Don’t let me down. Not being able to pick a winner will raise havoc with my self esteem. As for you Obama, you have a job to finish before you go back to Chicago and root for the White Sox. Just do it!

The Great Debate

To watch or not to watch. That is the question and I do not have an answer yet. The hours are dwindling by to a precious few and soon I must step up to the bar and decide whether or not to watch the Obama-Romney debate tonight. Methinks that as long as I'm going to the bar , I'll order a few stiff drinks to help me make my decision. Watching the Yankees clinch the AFL Eastern Division title is an attractive alternative to the debate. Watching the Indians play in an empty stadium is not an attractive alternative - it will take a "lost Weekend" worth of drinks to make me watch them - I'd probably think they were going to the playoffs.

 I've listened to Obama and Romney so much in the past few months that I don't see why I should waste my time watching them tonight. I'm just about convinced that I should watch the Yankees. By the way, I've adopted the Yankees as my favorite to win the the Series. The nice thing about that is, if they don't, I won't really give a shit - damn Yankees.

I don't know why I'm having this great debate. After all, the High Primal will make the final decision and she could care less about baseball. I also forgot to mention that I've already voted by mail. Hope Obama doesn't fuck up.

A sure bet to clinch last place

The tightest race in the American League is between the Indians and the Twins for last place in the Central Division. Only 1.5 games separate these wannabe baseball teams. It should be a neck and neck race for the next 30 games but I have a feeling that the Indians will outsmart the Twins. Rumor has it that Manny Acta has suspended batting practise for the remainder of the season hoping this will motivate his players to relax more during a game. This should result in more strike outs. It's a desperate move but the stakes are high. No one can accuse the Indians of mediocrity - they are doing their best to be the worst team in baseball. Go Tribe!

As plain as the nose on Chief Wahoo's face

The Cleveland Indians are on a tear. Not satisfied with being a contender at the All-Star break, they have apparently resolved to clinch last place in the AL Central Division. The Twins will have something to say about this but in the end they will graciously give up their hold on last place. Of course, the Indians could suddenly change their minds and accept mediocrity as compared to being a solid loser. Be that as it may, you can stick a fork in the 2012 season; it's done!

It won’t be long before the sports writers and the fans call for someone’s scalp or scalps. The General Manager, the Manager, the coaches are already circling their wagons. Even the owners will be called upon to sell the team and let someone with a true commitment to winning take over.

This is all nonsense. The reason for the annual collapse of the Cleveland Indians is as plain as the nose on Chief Wahoo’s face. The Chief long ago placed a curse on the Indians. Until he is granted his hard-earned retirement, the team is doomed to be the laughing stock of MLB. That the owners don’t understand this, is testimony to their lack of baseball acumen.

Get rid of the Chief! The cost will be minimal - just some minor changes in the uniforms. Sure, some bigoted fans will tear up their season tickets but that loss of ticket purchasers will be minimal compared to the number of fans lost as seasons such as this one become the norm. It is time to take the Chief’s curse seriously. It is time to bring the Cleveland Indians into the twenty-first century.