Are MBA's Still Relevant?

As the auto industry continues to crumble, I can't help but take a swipe at those arrogant MBA's who thought they would rule the world. Its no wonder that The Ford Motor Company is still hanging in there . Look at who is running it - an engineer! Are MBA's still relevant? Only the humble ones!

Recession Proof Robins

The days are well beyond the official proclamation of Spring but I have yet to see that first robin with a worm in its beak which is my definition of Spring. What I have seen are obese robins dancing around on the lawn, pecking away at insects. How did they get so fat during the horrible winter? They certainly are not a testimony to the recession we are experiencing. What do they know that we don’t know? Nothing! They’re bird brains! They’re too stupid to fret over where the next insect will come from. Live it up today there may not be a tomorrow, that’s their motto. Come to think of it nature’s creatures are recession proof. Well, maybe not those which would make a meal.

Obama's Afghan Strategy

How do we get out of Afghanistan? Obama's Afghan strategy does not make this clear, at least for me. Maybe we should ask the Russians? I sure hope Afghanistan does not result in Obama's Vietnam as some have suggested. Why does history play such a small role in shaping foreign policy and planning military strategy? I sure have a lot of questions with no answers.

This evening's PBS Newshour interview with Envoy Richard Holbrooke and General David Petraeus did much to provide some answers. Worth listening to. Two impressive men who are forming a team that may get us someplace.

Viva Globalization

According to a New York Times report this past Tuesday , Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano called the war against drugs “a demand issue and a supply issue.” Now I understand what’s going on with the violence on the Mexican border. Its all the result of globalization. We have a voracious appetite for drugs, Mexico has tons of drugs, drugs are illegal, drug lords need to kill policeman and each other in order to export the drugs , drug lords need guns to kill and maim (As the CEO of the NRA pointed out, men with the guns make the rules) , we have lots of guns to export . Supply and demand takes over. Drug lords become billionaires, gun suppliers become millionaires, more Americans become druggies, more Mexicans die in the violence. More importantly mideast style violence comes to our shores! Is someone trying to resurrect the Mexican-American War?

The Keyword Is Persistence

For one hour this evening I listened to what I thought was a great press conference held by an articulate, compassionate and well informed President. So I thought! I made the mistake of briefly tuning into " the best political team on television", CNN and quickly found that I had watched the wrong press conference. Obama evidently had a poor night ( probably because he showed some rare anger with the questioning of a CNN reporter). Obama did not have the answer on how soon the deficit will be reduced to zero. Obama keeps saying the same things. The grenades were being lobbied left and right. After turning the experts off I realized that I had in fact watched the Obama press conference and it was great. The experts missed one key point in the conference , its all about persistence. The President is a believer in persistence . He will keep pushing for solutions which will bring about an economic renaissance for this country. There will be failures but he will be persistent in pursuing the fixes generated by his team. What more can we ask for? Put away the grenades and get behind the man who will persist on pushing programs to make us healthy again. As the President said in his conference it would be nice if there were easy answers, then everyone could go home. I have not heard anyone propose better solutions than those of the Obama administration , yet they persist on being committed to seeing him fail. God save America!

A Stimulus Package From Trojan Condoms

I could not believe what I was watching last night during a Sportscenter commercial break on ESPN. The TV screen was suddenly full of Old Glory and an American Eagle. The audio referred to the tough economic times we are having and then hinted that there was a package for surviving . The screen is now full of a Trojan condom package. The audio gives us all hope by emphasizing that together we can survive these hard times. My take, screw your heads off and you will never notice how bad off you are. Trojan's version of a stimulus package sucks! (Did I miss something? I must admit I had been napping Ala Ronald Reagan before viewing the commercial.)

Will Korea Have Its Revenge?

Tonight Korea may finally settle its quarrels with Japan. It will be done on a baseball field and hopefully there will be no bloodshed. (It is rumored that the Korean national team has recruited some aging “ comfort girls” to wield thunder sticks to distract the Japanese players.) It would be fitting for Korea to beat Japan for the championship and thus save countless hours at the United Nations trying to settle their differences.
In my opinion ,until tonight, the World Baseball Classic has been duller than watching grass grow at a spring training game. How did Bud Selig arrange Korea vs. Japan for the championship? Japan will emerge victorious. They make better cars.

The President And Comedy

Lately presidential candidates have taken to the talk shows as a campaign gimmick. Unfortunately this calls for trying to be funnier than the comedic host. I can stomach this, since the campaigns these days resemble a TV situation comedy series but once the campaign is over " la comedia e finite" quoting Pagliaccio . Surviving a campaign and being elected President of The United States signals that the luxury of being a comedian is over. Hopefully Obama learned his lesson with the Special Olympics joke on the Leno show. My advice - leave the comedy to the professionals. At the very minimum hire a comedy writer for the White House. I'm sure there would many applicants led by John McCain , followed by those erstwhile comedians Mitch McConnell, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi ,John Boehner and of course Dick Cheney . Joe Biden would be great but he likes his current gig. George the Bush need not apply, he's not very funny.
( I reviewed this post with my high primal thinking spouse and she advised me that I should take Pagliaccio's advice as far as the comedy is concerned. Furthermore she informed me that my suggestion of a comedy writer is not new. Morey Amsterdam was J.F.K's comedy advisor. Back to the drawing board.)

Is It Spring Yet?

The calender indicates that spring is here but I'm not quite sure. The robins are hopping around outside but I have yet to see one with a worm in its beak. Until that happens I'm holding back on any yard work in spite of hints from the high primal thinker. Opening day for the Indians might be a better clue that Spring is here but we had a snowstorm last year on opening day. I think I'll wait for summer before getting around to any yard work. I doubt that I'll get away with it. Just remembered , I got rid of the yard tools when we moved last fall. If the high primal thinker has any coupons , I may invest in some new ones - made in the U.S.A. Obama would like that but the problem is ,the last I heard garden tools are now made in China. Looks like I won't be doing much garden work. I could hire it out. That will keep the job loss problem in check.

Enough Is Enough!

Congressmen and Wolf Blitzer are tripping all over one another to make a story about bailout "fraud" ala AIG. Its the least of our worries right now as aptly said on the Erin Obrien blog.

On Urinating

It was raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock when Joe the Loser set out, full of piss and vinegar, to apply for a five hundred dollar loan. At the bank ,Joe the Loser was ready to sign for the loan when the banker suddenly asked if he had any collateral. Joe the Loser explained that he didn’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. The banker replied with a smirk, “I thought you looked piss-poor ”. Joe the Loser told the banker to go piss up a rope , went to the saloon next door and got pissed to the gills. The next day the local paper’s lead story was about a bank robbery. Police described the bank robber as inebriated with piss stained pants. They couldn’t explain why in addition to five hundred dollars , a large pot from the bank president’s office was stolen. My guess is that Joe the Loser got his loan and a pot to piss in besides.

The Pope And Condoms

During his trip to Africa , Pope Benedict XVI said condoms are not the answer to the AIDS epidemic in Africa and can make the problem worse. The all knowing leader of the Catholic Church has come to the amazing conclusion that condoms increase the problem . He furthur proclaims that a responsible and moral attitude toward sex would help fight the disease. He is absolutely sure of this because the Roman Catholic Church is at the forefront of the battle against AIDS. I suppose this means abstinence. If you don't use it you will lose it . If you lose it why should you care about AIDS. If you don't care about AIDS , the problem has disappeared. Besides how can you have a responsible and moral attitude toward sex if you never experience sex. Pass out the condoms!

So Much For Irish Cusine

My high primal thinking spouse has Irish roots. I guess that's where the According To Marge sayings come from. Irish cooking is not among her many talents. After dismissing Corned Beef And Cabbage and a New England Boiled Dinner, our menu on St. Patrick's Day will feature steak from a certified Irish cow ( grilled not boiled). With a nod to Ireland, we'll indulge in some Irish Coffee. HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!

Downsizing Religion -Some Random Thoughts

Today’s paper ( The Plain Dealer) was full of stories concerning the downsizing of Catholic parishes in the Cleveland area.

Along with the news was a soul searching Regina Brett column invoking The Resurrection as a means to stomach the downsizing . I probably came to the wrong conclusion but her column confused me. Perhaps she only needed an outlet for her religious emotions.

I’m surprised that the editors did not seize the opportunity to promote blogging as a replacement for lost parishes. They already have a sports writer, Terry Pluto, writing a weekly religious column ( not surprising in that baseball has become a religious experience).

A point made in one story rang a bell with me. Most of the parishes being ex-communicated were formerly immigrant parishes - Italian, Irish, Slovenian, Polish, German, you name it. Can I conclude that these immigrant groups are now Americans and have assimilated into the suburban Catholic parishes?

Evidently the new immigrants, Hispanic and African do not have enough clout yet to absorb the abandoned parishes but I‘m sure that will change.

It looks like there will be more real estate blight in Cleveland.

Any chance that some of the vacated churches may become mosques, or are they facing the wrong way?

It seems like Obama has made more speeches in the first 50 days of his presidency than George W. did in eight years. Of course my definition of a speech would disqualify much of Bush's drivel.

Credit Card Crunch

Just read that the next credit crunch will be credit cards. Surprise, surprise! We live in a house of cards and the big bad wolf is ready to blow it down. It has started already with the subtle fine print in the monthly statement advising you of a change of terms. Unfortunately the explanation is unintelligible and probably should be taken to a lawyer. The problem with that is the lawyer wants a retainer and does not accept credit cards. Apparently somewhere in the fine print is a disclosure that the credit line is being reduced. This is a good move on the part of the credit card companies. Tighten up credit, customers will stop using credit cards, credit card companies will start losing billions, credit card companies will get billions in bailout money! Another problem for consumers is their credit score. In someones infinite wisdom it is tied to their line of credit. The lower the line of credit , the lower the credit score. The lower the credit score, the more unfavorable the terms for borrowing will be. Actually it should not really matter since lending institutions do not want to lend anymore. The United States has come up with earth shaking technological advances. Its creativity in financial packages has also been earth shaking. We could have done without the latter.

How To Survive The Great Recession

-Get a shoeshine box
-Learn to darn socks (http://www.ehow.com/how_648_darn-sock.html)
-Rollback technology in favor of more pick and shovels
-Invest in a good mattress not insured by the FDIC
-Have Madison Ave come up with some imaginative logos
-Bring back the WPA and the CCC
-Elect fewer Republicans
-Don't pave Wall Street
-Turn Main Street into a Boulevard
-Drink more beer and less scotch
-Turn off the TV
-Bring back "One Man's Family" on the radio
-Learn to roller skate or get a horse
-Become a vegetarian
-Last but not least get on AIG's board

Chief Wahoo Dying A Slow Death

I have concluded that Chief Wahoo (Cleveland Indians logo) has been sentenced to die a slow death. About the only places he is to be seen is on ticket sale advertisements and some baseball uniforms. It must be noted that in regard to the latter he has been relegated to a small patch. No one will acknowledge that he is on his way out. The Indians front office as well The Plain Dealer apparently have decided that slowly diminishing his exposure to baseball fans is the least controversial path to his eventual death. The Chief is in hospice and most certainly he will die a slow death! Last seen, Chief Wahoo looked very pale and was entering the Cleveland Clinic ( no self respecting Indian wants to be a paleface). Good luck Chief! Too bad you could not have gone out more ceremoniously but that's the Cleveland way.

LaPierre Distorts History

At the recent CPAC convention all sorts of crap spewed from the podium. The crappiest of all (Rush Limbaugh came in a close second) was Wayne LaPierre, CEO of the National Rifle Association. According to LaPierre " our founding fathers understood that the men with a gun make the rules". He must have confused our founding fathers with Al-Qaeda. His history books may have been written by extreme Muslims. La Pierre is the best argument there is for gun control.

Is The Plain Dealer Wimpy About Chief Wahoo?

Through a letter to the editor and an e-mail to readers representative Ted Diadiun ( who incidentally is more of a newspaper defender rather than an ombudsman) I have attempted to secure some comment as to whether or not the Cleveland Indians Chief Wahoo is a persona non-grata in The Plain Dealer sports pages ( my post Has The Chief Been Retired - 2/18/09). To date there has not been a hint as to what’s up. Mr. Diadiun is too busy defending comic strips and cartoons. The opinion pages are full of letters on earthshaking topics such as corrupt politics and rusting bridges. The sports writers pontificate about the Indians new digs in Goodyear , Arizona . No news of the Chief! No images of the Chief! Guess what? The script I has disappeared since I wrote my unpublished letter to the editor. Why is The Plain Dealer so wimpy about Chief Wahoo? Afraid of offending some baseball fans who hide their racism behind tradition? It is time for change (where have I heard that before?). Chief Wahoo must go to the Happy Hunting Grounds. It is time for The Plain Dealer to publish his obituary.