Polling Poles

I've already voted, so current polls have no bearing and my choice for POTUS. Even so, they do have a bearing on my mental health. Obama or Romney is a shoo-in depending on which poll suits Blitzer. Obama by a whisker. Romney closing the gap. I'm convinced that none of these political polls are reliable. Before taking the bridge over poll results, I decided to consult with poles that I trust.

• The Pole who lives next door said that the outcome of the election will depend on which candidate visits Poland in the next few days.
• The Telephone Pole showsObama supporters are leading the race in collect calls and Romney supporters are leading the race in robo calls.
• The Dance Pole unequivocally has Democrats  outspending Republicans for lap dances.
• The Ski Pole indicates that the United States will be on a slippery slope no matter the outcome. Romney might have the edge because of his Utah ties and CEO experience.
• The Fishing Pole has Romney ahead hands down. He's still fishing for an identity.
• The Flag Pole has Obama overwhelmingly ahead He's earned his stripes in the past four years.

• A major disappointment was the Totem Pole. The Totem Pole people said in no uncertain terms that they would not touch the election with a ten foot pole. It has something to do with Native Amricans wanting to be poltically correct.