Finches On Strike

No way to run a diner

As Campaign 2012 heats up, I’m surprised that no one has picked up on the dearth of finches this summer. The finch population is noticeably reduced. As a result, finch feeders are in trouble. According to Obama the private sector is doing fine but who’s worrying about the bird sector. The bird sector, as far as finches are concerned, has gone to the birds. Romney has not chirped about this in his commercials. I suspect that he has outsourced our finch population to China.

Tony’s Finch Diner is on the verge of bankruptcy once again. The diner’s business plan took a hit over a year ago when he had to move the diner from a prime location. Tony’s Finch Diner was ordered shutdown by the F------s Homeowners Association. As reported in this blog, “Unknown asses have succeeded in getting the f***ing F------s Homeowners Association to order Tony to get his Finch Diner the hell off of common property. The asses are suspected to be Tea Party activists who don‘t have the cagliones to do anything important in local politics. Not wanting to make waves, Tony has agreed to move his diner to safe ground.”

The “safe ground” worked fine until this Spring. In 2012 finches have been scarcer than a hens teeth. I really don’t think that politics has anything to do with the catastrophic drop in business. I say this because my limited knowledge of finch chatter picked up what I’m sure was a chirp that the finches are pissed with the f***ing F------s Homeowners Association and won’t have anything to do with finch feeders in the area. This observation has been confirmed by The High Primal who emphatically stated that the f**king birds are on strike. Tony’s Finch Diner has fed a few scabs lately but that hardly makes the effort of maintaining the feeder worth it.

Tony’s Finch Diner Board of Directors is scheduled to meet later this month to consider what action should be taken. The rumor is that the diner will remain open at least until the November election. The betting is that if Romney wins, the diner will end up in the trash barrel along with the rest of the country.