Will Toilets Go Paperless?

Whether by snail mail, e-mail or simply accessing your financial instution's web site you are beseeched to forgo paper statements. Go green! Go paperless! Earn a reward by opting to receive your statements on the Internet. It's not limited to financial institutions. Anyone who owes you an accounting of transactions is on the bandwagon to clean up the environment, or so they would have you believe.

So far I've resisted going paperless. A large part of this resistance comes from my high primal thinker. "What if something happens to our computer, we'll be stuck with some late payment fees. What about the people who don't have a computer? No, no no!" That's enough for me. Still if the high primal didn't give a damn, I'd have a problem with this latest hypocrisy of Big Business. They have never done any thing voluntarily for the good of American people - it has always taken legislation, which in these days they are seeking to control. Anything they do voluntarily such as urging us to protect the environment by going paperless is not motivated by a desire to do what's good for the country. There's a buck in it for them. Why else would they use more paper urging us to use less paper. Is it possible that going  paperless is a sure bet to save them money through fewer jobs and the increased opportunity for late payment or overdraft fees.

As for fees, I'm sure that they will play their trump card in the very near future. Sign up for paperless or pay a monthly fee to receive a paper statement by mail. That is the price we will pay for allowing Congress and the President to have the audacity to legislate meaningful credit card and financial legislation.

While we are increasingly urged to save a tree by going paperless, I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. All sales of toilet paper will cease by 2020. Red blooded Americans will be urged to buy some fancy contraption which cleanses the soiled body parts sans paper. If they can't afford this new contraption, recycling newspapers will be their only alternative. Hopefully, newspapers will still be around.

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