The British Are Coming!

One of the targets of rightists and lately The Tea Party movement is what is referred to as big government. Somehow or other big government has to go. How to make it go is not very clear. Actually the solution to making big government small is to reduce what it has to govern. Fifty states , each with their own special needs breeds big government and raises the national debt. I submit the following plan which The Tea Party is welcome to:

1. Return the Louisiana Purchase to France for a refund. This would get rid of almost fourteen states.
2. Sell Alaska including Sarah Palin back to Russia. If they balk at Palin being part of the deal try Canada. If Canada wants no part of Palin, remind them that you can see Russia from her home. That should clinch the deal.
3. Give California its independence as long as they pay back all Federal subsidies.
4. Texas should be attractive to Mexico as a haven for disgruntled Mexicans. Again the Bush family must be part of the deal. I'm sure that "W" will relish the opportunity to bring real democracy to Mexico as he did in the Mideast.
5. Washington State should bring a handsome price from Japan.
6. Florida logically should go to Cuba but money may be a problem. Israel?
7. Free Puerto Rico!
8. Why not give Manhattan back to the Indians. That will certainly make a dent in big government.
9. Other than the original thirteen colonies , the remaining states could be auctioned off on eBay.

Implicit in all these sales is that people go along with the territory. Small government does not want to be bothered with the needs of its citizens. Its every man or woman for himself or herself.

Once the deals are completed , those citizens residing in the colonies can put on their three cornered hats and have one grand tea party celebrating small government. Unfortunately the celebration will not last long.

Saddle up Paul Revere's horse. The British are coming! The British are coming! They have unfinished business here!