All About Hats

    As far as running for a party’s presidential nomination goes, writing a book is the choice of most politicos to signal that they are in the race. If he is running for a lesser office, he must make do with “ my hat is in the ring”. Unfortunately the latter cliché also signals that the aspiring candidate is being less than honest. When is the last time you saw a politician wearing a hat?
    Come to think of it, hats just are not popular anymore except on a frigid day. Gone are the days when the drop of a hat would signal the start of a fight or a race. A gun is much more effective. For the timid , a wave of a green flag is the weapon of choice.
    To show respect for someone it is customary to approach the individual with hat in hand. With the demise of hats , respect is a thing of the past.
    More on “ hat in hand”. Organizations in need of money used to approach a government agency with hat in hand. Lately it has been found that a bribe is much more effective.
    Some people have too many hats. Someone who wears many hats is busier than a one armed paper hanger with the clap, never mind that he looks like a clown.
     Hats are frequently used by magicians. Just ask our President. Obama who is desperately trying to pull a rabbit of the hat in order to gain a second term as one crisis after another falls at his doorstep. One thing for sure, he can't sweep them under the rug. When informed of the Egyptian uprising, it was reported that his first words were, " I need that like a I need a hole in the head".
    As long as I'm targeting politicians, it was also reported that after receiving the Speaker's gavel from Nancy Pelosi, John Boehner whispered to her, " here's your hat, what's your hurry".
    I asked my spouse for her opinion of this post. After a quick review, she questioned some of my grammar. I took issue with some of her comments, after which she told me in no uncertain terms to go shit in my hat. First thing this afternoon, I'm going out to buy a replacement hat.

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