State Of The Blog

Fellow Bloggers and Readers,

I sit here at the keyboard today trying to assess the effectiveness of this blog. I must report that that I have fallen short on a number of issues I promised to myself that I would follow through on.- (Groans)

Fortunately I never promised you that I'd follow through with anything. (Applause)

To begin with, I have not ended the Iraq War. My connections in Washington say it will be a done deal by the end of the year - (Cheers) - but I must report that these connections are very fragile - (Boo's). To make matters worse even if the Iraq War ends I'll still have the war in Afghanistan to write about - ( Groans with a smattering of cheers).

I thought that by now gun control would take center stage as an issue to deal with, but again I must report that my blog has not influenced anyone - (polite applause with a few groans). I'm thinking of going underground on this one and joining the NRA but my sources say that if I attempt this I'll be underground for sure. -(Cheers). Incidentally why does the media report on body count in the Mideast Wars but not that on our city streets? - (Silence)

My attempts at being a political pundit have met with some success. There have been at least two comments on my posts. -(standing ovation). But even here , my connections in Washington have made it known that they don't need any help from me, just money. -(polite applause).

I could go on and on, - ( Groans and abusive shouts), but I think that I've made my point. My blog has not been effective in influencing any major, minor or minuscule issues in this country. I'll be interested to hear what my Washington connections have to say about their plans for the country when they take to the airways Wednesday. These connections by the way are an occasional few bucks to the DNC. - ( shouts of fraud)

For those of you who have concluded that my blogging days are over or should be over, I have news for you. Not on your life. -(Groans). It's too much fun! -(more groans)

Good day or night whatever the case might be and God bless America and any other country he or she sees fit to bless!

-(complete silence gives way to wild applause when everyone realizes this post is over)